Miss Kitty’s Parlour was a sex-positive club in Los Angeles, California known for its emphasis on sexiness, eroticism, and an almost anything goes attitude towards their clientele.
So, let us travel in the Wayback Machine and see what all the excitement was about.
Miss Kitty
Miss Kitty is no pussycat.
Miss Kitty, on the left, manages her parlour, ensuring the performers know their stuff. Note: while on stage, Miss Kitty refers to the parlour’s patrons as “you fuckers”.
Miss Kitty serves drinks.
Here we see Miss Kitty serving a drink to a female patron. Yes, the drink is served in an unusual container, but the patron is not complaining.
Drinks are on me.
Miss Kitty ensures that customers have a full pour when ordering drinks.
Don’t miss a drop!
Our blonde drink pourer watches to ensure the patron is satisfied with her drink.
Go ahead and swallow; you earned it!
Yes, Miss Kitty looks after her staff and her patrons. Good kitty!
Miss Kitty’s Performances
Miss Kitty’s Parlour has on-going performances throughout the club, plus staged performances.
A domestic servant serves dinner.
In this scene, the french maid, ever helpful, has prepared the suckling pig, and is about to display the feast.
Dinner is served.
Our piglet seems a bit malnourished and undercooked, but I’m sure the maid and her master will find something useful to do with it.
Something is wrong here…or is it?
Some performances do not have such an obvious theme; rather, they just depict random acts of kindness. And debauchery.
Yes, many of these images can be captioned, “I have no idea what is happening.”
Miss Kitty’s Bedtime Stories
Bedtime stories.
On a quiet Saturday evening, there is nothing more fun than cuddling up in bed with a good book.
Yes, that’s a good book. A very good book.
Sometimes, it’s fun to invite a book-reading friend and share the story. Oh, what a fun story they must be reading!
Well, I guess they got distracted.
For some reason, this other person, who is obviously not a book reader, joined the couple, interrupting their quiet evening of reading.
There is only one way to handle this situation.
At Miss Kitty’s Parlour, many problems are solved with a spanking.
Miss Kitty’s Spankings
Yes, spanking is a common theme here at the parlour.
The Red Queen has a small heart.
Some spankings are symbolic. They are meant to teach a small lesson about small acts of mischievousness.
This looks interesting…
A patron of Miss Kitty’s Parlour volunteers to be spanked, for reasons of her own. So, the professional spanker prepares himself. I’m not sure why there is a tail attached to the girl, but, okay.
Swing and a hit.
With a loud smack, the professional spanker smacks the behind of the spankee. Ouch.
Rosy cheeks.
Finally, the finished product is displayed: the warmed and slightly-swollen bottom of a patron. Just another day at the parlor.
Miss Kitty’s Minotaur
A minotaur sits on a crimson throne, speaking to a princess. I join them.
Yes, he is very horny.
I try to engage the couple, but they do not make eye-contact with me. How strange.
Where’s the caterpillar?
I’m not sure what our minotaur is doing to his princess, but I practice my sucking. You never know when you’ll need to do that, amirite, ladies?
More is better.
It’s not long before other suckers join us. Also, note the come-hither look the cameraman is getting from the princess. Hmmmmmm.
A butt made for squeezing.
Our minotaur gets up to retrieve a bottle of liquor, and an opportunity presents itself. “Try before you buy,” I always say.
Don’t spill any!
I ask for a drink. He says, “Sure,” but there is a price. Technically, I should get two drinks, right?
Pretty in pink.
Another patron joins us to have her photograph taken. Man, minotaurs are chick magnets! Who knew?
I guess she was thirsty, too.
Our new friend joins us for a drink. I wonder how quickly that Vodka will be all gone…
Miss Kitty’s Boobs
Since we have touched on the subject of boobs, we might as well continue.
Boobs: is there anything they can’t do?
I have it on good authority that there is an average of one boob per person on our planet. Yet, the facts are that these aforementioned boobs are controlled by just one half of the population. So, as good citizens, we must learn to share.
We share because we care.
Endless fun.
What’s great about fondling boobs is that it’s fun for the fondler and for the fondlee.
Miss Kitty’s Tattoos
Let’s take a look at the wonderful world of tattoos!
“Peecha wanchee lockhba tang nannee du chonky troy.”
I feel certain that, if Jabba had had his way, Leia would have looked like this. And I would have approved.
Wings and skulls.
Is there a feng shui to these tattoos that I don’t see? Or is it just a mess of tattoos placed wherever there was space?
But I do like that creepy guy in the background.
Okay, then.
She has an eye on her throat, a word on her stomach written in undecipherable script, and a ram’s skull on her abdomen. I imagine her vulva is incorporated into the ram’s skull, but, luckily, I’ll never know.
By that time, it’s too late.
So, let’s say you meet this lady, you hit it off, and you take her home. She’s on the bed on her hands and knees, and you’re going at it, then you notice her tattoo. “We all make mistakes”. Yup, that would kinda put a dent in your mood, doncha think?
Tatties on her titties.
I included this photograph just because she’s cute. Move along…
There’s a story behind that one.
Since the tattoo shows a girl with red hair, I’m assuming the tattoo represents the girl. It’s a bad drawing of, I think, a ballerina with a black eye and a misshaped top or misshaped heart or misshaped boobs. Also, girls with big boobs playing foosball are fun to watch.
Miss Kitty’s Poses
Folks come to Miss Kitty’s Parlour to see and be seen, and they love posing for the camera.
Smile!
This is going well until Princess Trust And Believe has some kind of incident. Yeah, not all poses turn out well.
Ha ha! Got it!
Yeah, I’m a sucker for a man in drag, so I do the ol’ grab and go. And, in a little while, I’ll get around to going. Also, don’t mind his expression. It’s his only look.
You meet the best people when you ask them to pose with you.
Smart Towel RG-400.
You might have noticed Towelie in those posing photographs. Normally, all smoking has to be done outside in the patio but, come on, it’s Towelie!
Miss Kitty’s Twister
Twister is a game of physical skill produced by Milton Bradley Company and Winning Moves Games USA. It is played on a large plastic mat that is spread on the floor or ground. The mat has four rows of six large colored circles on it with a different color in each row: red, yellow, green, and blue. A spinner tells players where they have to place their hand or foot. The game promotes itself as “the game that ties you up in knots”.
Okay, but Miss Kitty’s spinner has things like “Left hand, taint,” and “Right hand, boob.” Plus, free liquor, which helps with flexibility.
Yes, I’m a dick head.
Yes, a dick head with a farmer’s tan.
We hope you have enjoyed our look back in time at the wonderful Miss Kitty’s Parlour. Until next time, you fuckers!